How often do you find yourself wanting to change something in your life? It could be something about your relationships, job, finances, kids, physical health, body, emotions or just about anything.
Most of us spend a huge amount of our mental energy thinking and dreaming about what we want to change in and about our lives.
Many of us fall into the “I’ll be happy when” way of thinking. This usually means I’ll be happy when something in my life changes.
We continually want things to change, but we don’t do what’s necessary to actually bring about the changes in our lives that we say we want.
It took me years to figure out how to go about changing things in my life that I wanted to change. Not just talking about it, but actually doing it.
Now that I’ve figured out the formula, I’ve learned that nothing in my life is going to change unless I do certain things.
And before I even do anything, I need to first understand that change is always an inside job. When we don’t realize that, it doesn’t matter what we do, nothing is going to change.
I learned that lesson the hard way many years ago when I had a boss that was impossible to work with. She was often demeaning and a bully and I spent many hours and lots of tears, trying to figure out how to get along with her.
You see the lesson I was meant to learn at that time, was how to stand up for myself and love myself enough to let her know that her behavior was not acceptable, even though she was my boss.
Instead of finding the courage to speak with her directly, I decided to get another job and leave her (the problem) behind.
The only problem was that while I may have left her behind, I brought my problem with me. My problem was that I didn’t love myself enough and therefore, always put other peoples needs ahead of my own.
I’ll never know how that job might have been different if I’d loved myself enough to stand up for myself. I may have still decided to leave, but I would have done so from a place of self-love as opposed to avoidance.
So one thing I know for sure is that you get the changes you want on the outside by changing what’s going on inside. That goes for finances, your body, relationships, your career and anything else that you can think of wanting to change.
There are 3 non-negotiable things that you must do if you want to experience a lasting change in your life.
You must spend time every day in meditation and become aware of what’s up with your thoughts, feelings and what your body is telling you.
When I talk about meditation I am referring to those activities or practices that create an opportunity for you to connect with yourself and be inwardly focused.
It’s all about becoming aware of who you are and what you want in life.
You are not able to change things that you are not aware of. You must become intimately aware of your thoughts and feelings and how you perceive the world.
Without that awareness, you will continue to try and make changes from the outside in. And we know that that approach always leads to frustration and unhappiness.
When all your energy is outwardly focused and your life is full of distractions, it is impossible to receive the messages from your heart and soul about what is going to bring you happiness.
If you want to learn how to introduce a 5 minute meditation into your day, go to the top of this page to download your free guide and a guided meditation.
You must spend time every day in prayer.
When I talk about prayer, I am referring to prayer in a non-religious context. Prayer is an act of communication.
“A solemn request for help or expression of thanks addressed to God or an object of worship”.
Simple right? That pretty much sums it up. You pray by either asking for help about something or to say “thank you”.
You don’t need to believe in god to pray.
What kind of help can I ask for? You might ask for help to grow in wisdom, compassion or insight. Or you may be asking for guidance or for skills like courage, patience or peace of mind in difficult times.
Prayer doesn’t need to be complicated or formal. As Meister Eckhard said, “if the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough.”
You must spend time every day feeling inspired.
We all have old garbage thinking that doesn’t serve us and isn’t even true about us.
We have messages from our early years that were planted like seeds and are growing and impacting our current lives.
Many of these beliefs are helpful and some are downright destructive.
Once we’re mindful of our thoughts, we can begin to change them. But what are we going to change them to?
That’s where the inspirational content comes in. It can be in the form of books, inspiring documentaries, workshops, mentors, and spiritual readings. Anything that creates opportunities for you to expand your thinking and replace your old repetitive thinking with something that moves you towards the changes you want in your life.
For me personally, spiritual readings of all types from all traditions have given me new things to think about. For example, in the past, I may have thought that I wasn’t very creative. That was a hugely limiting belief that prevented me from doing all sorts of things. Understanding spiritual principles have challenged my old beliefs and given me an opportunity to chose a new belief. Now I believe I am creative and that understanding how creativity works in the universe means I can toss my old belief that wasn’t serving me.
The trick is, all three of these things need to be done daily. We don’t change because we want to change. We change because we take action and do something every day that enables us to not just change in the moment but change our lives.
So if you want something to change in your life, you need to change what you’re doing. Not on the outside, but on the inside. With this power formula in your toolkit, look out what you wish for because in all likelihood it will come true.